Sunday, February 20, 2011

It's gone!

Well on Wednesday I had my gallbladder removed!! Bring on the onions and guacamole!
This was my 7th surgery; I had my tonsils out when I was 12 and then 5 laparoscopy's for my endometriosis. I forgot this time when I went that I probably should have been at least a little bit nervous. In the prep area you could sense everyone's nerves and hear their forced laughter. I was happy I wasn't scared, I was to busy thinking about Delilah and James and hoping they would be ok. Collin and I just sat there like we were waiting for a pizza not to have me rolled into surgery.
A few things happened this surgery that I wanted to write down to remember. The first is everyone who came in and looked at my chart would say "Oh you're healthy, this is going to be easy." It made me feel good to have several different people independently tell me I was healthy, I mean who wouldn't?It also makes me think that when people's gallbladder's go bad they might not be the healthiest of people.
The second thing. I'm a chatty drunk. As soon as I get drugs in my system I can't shut up. As the anestisiologist gave me the first shot, the one that makes me tired I told him that I say inappropriate things when I go under.
{Like the time I was 18 and about to have my 2nd laparoscopy. My sister Anna had to smother me with a pillow so I wouldn't laugh really loud at nurse who stood in front of my room with a HUGE butt. (And I thank her for that) That same time when they rolled me into the surgery room I realized there were no women in the room but me "Where are the women! This is a surgery for women and there are no women in this room!" My doctor then informed me there was indeed one female nurse amongst the five men. "I'm fine with it, I have nothing against men I just think it's weird" all of this was said in the same voice old people use when they talk, because they need to talk loud enough to hear themselves.}
Anyway back to this surgery, the anestisiologist gave me the injection before the operating room, always a risky move with me and my mouth. I tried really hard to not say anything that would embarass me. I don't remember being rolled to the operating room but I do remember when they had me shift from one table to the next. As I was shifting I felt the table and I asked where the hole for my butt was. Everyone in the room started laughing at me. I remember the anesthesiologist explain to everyone in the room that I had had a bunch of previous surgeries for endometriosis and that's why I was looking for a hole. Then I heard someone say this is just general surgery not OB. Now it's got me wondering what they were doing with that hole.
One more awesome thing happened to me before I went completely out. I was laying down now on the hole-less table. They started to strap me down and get ready to knock me out. My anesthesiologist told me he was about to put the oxygen mask on me when I interrupted him with; "I need some chap stick, do you have any chapstick? My lips are cracking."
"Ummm... chap stick?"
"Well it doesn't need to be chap stick, like vasaline or something like that? Do you have any vasaline?"
"Um, yah we have vasaline."
Then I felt this man who normally only gives people drugs, smear my lips with a glob of vasaline. Then I felt him wipe the excess on his finger off on the shoulder of my gown.
"Thank you"
Then he put me under.
Seriously? Can you get any cooler than me? I think they would prefer someone who is nervous over someone so comfortable that they request chap stick before going under.
You might not think these stories are that funny but for me I feel like they are hilarious and I have come a long way from my first surgery's when I was waking up velcroed to the bed.


Graydon Blair said...

"That was awesome!" - by Graydon

Le said...

It's funny to hear patients accounts and your is awesome.
The typical non-pregnant (that's it's own cateragory) person to get their gallbladder out is fair, fat and forty, most people by then have at least one health issue.

I remember waking up from mine in a lot of pain but I was still really sleepy. I remember hearing the PACU nurse giving report to the Same Day surgery nurse and thinking I would be so pissed to get me as a patient right now because I really hurt!

Heal well!

Andrea said...

I'm so happy for you!!! I hope your recovery goes well too.

Eve said...

I hope you are having a lot of fun with your reunion with yummy foods. The story about the nurse with the big bum cracked me up.

Jenson Evolution said...

So I laughed out loud at your chopstick story! Thanks for sharing!

red said...

Okay so I totally understand the vaseline thing. My lips are always really chappy. And I can't see at all, like TOTALLY blind and I always freak out, until the doctor comes in. I made Dr. Johnson hold my hand and asked him a bazillion times if I was going to be okay. I never noticed the hole in the table before. Glad it went well you're awesome. I ALWAYS just know I'm going to die.